Where Is Reality… What Is Reality?


In our last post, we explored a big Catch-22 situation… and the curious set-up between our Conscious Mind and our Unconscious Mind which manifests this Catch-22.

But there is another Catch-22 situation… which relates to our relationship to reality.

Or rather the world out there.

The reality in which we find ourselves… which surrounds us.

And also… to time… which is another dimension of reality (probably).

Because most Humans judge the validity of their inner thoughts and beliefs through some kind of comparison with what they call reality… with the world around them.

And if they don’t believe that a thing / thought can exist in reality… then they simply dismiss it… even if it might be the answer to all their prayers.

The world around them becomes their yardstick of and for truth… or rather their interpretation of reality.

But if reality arises from your thoughts / beliefs… then it becomes a very dodgy yardstick indeed.

And often means that a miracle can never happen for people… because in their version of reality miracles cannot occur.

As Henry Ford famously said, “If you believe you can, or you believe you can’t, then you are right either way.”

And as someone once said to me… “If you are looking for a miracle, who would you rather have around you… A lot of skeptical and cynical Doctors and Scientists… Or be surrounded by a coach load of excited, true Catholic believers on their way to visit Holy Lourdes?”

And this all comes about… this second Catch-22… because our Human Brains are designed to take external reality very seriously indeed… because our life and continued survival often depends on doing so.

Especially if we are walking across the plains of the Serengeti, with a backpack of basic food rations, a rifle, and only 12 bullets… our eyes continually on high-alert for any twitch or movement in the tall grass around us.

In those kind of situations… or when we feel any kind of desperate need… especially when and where money is concerned… our brains switch to survival mode… and people can remain stuck there long after the immediate danger has passed.

Survival mode can seriously distort any attempt to use an affirmation.

Let me explain…

Let us imagine a man waking up in the morning… his alarm sounds… reminding him to do his daily affirmations

So for the next 20 minutes he repeats… “I am wealthy and prosperous… my life is full of financial abundance… and I am happy.”

And he will also say this for a further 20 minutes, just before falling asleep… which is the other good time to do affirmation work… both before and after sleep.

And then… after he has completed his morning affirmations

He gets up… goes to work… for a lousy and soul-destroying $15,000 a year… working in a job he hates… for a boss who treats him badly… and his days are literally spent watching the clock… waiting for the exact moment he can escape again, and go home…

No wonder he does his affirmations religiously… who can blame him… he wants to create and manifest a better future for himself… a better life… and that is to his credit.

But here is the BIG problem.

It’s a question of inner reality versus external reality… and which one is more true… and which one is more powerful… and also more magnetic?

And also about protection and safety.

And especially… which one our Brain takes more notice of… especially when it has switched to survival mode.

Now if we use Neville Goddard’s famous manifestation formula of The Feeling of the Wish Fulfilled for some guidance here… the process:

  • We say our affirmation
  • We visualize our intention
  • We enter into the feeling of how we will feel once it has manifest

And that is exactly what our man is doing in the morning and evening, before and after sleep… as completely as he can… and let’s assume he is very successful at stating what he wants… visualizing it clearly… and entering into the feelings associated with that potential reality… or the actual inner reality he is creating.

But here’s the thing…

Manifestation is meant to work because the inner reality which we are conjuring up within our Minds becomes more juicy and attractive then our outer reality… more complete… more real then the real thing.

That’s the theory (with or without Neville’s full buy in)… and in this situation… any future must be better then where he currently is… you would think.

But, in our example, there is a part of his Unconscious Mind that cannot and will not accept this emerging inner reality as being… reality… and so will resist.


Because that part of his Brain, the part that is designed to scan the external world for danger… the Fight, Flight, and Freeze part… is focused on the awful job and the horrible boss… because that is his current reality… and that is what he needs protecting from.

For this part of his Brain… that is reality… everything else is still imagination… and it wouldn’t be doing its job correctly… to protect and help him survive… if it lost focus on the present and real moment, and the danger.

So this is the juggling act for the Unconscious Mind… the BIG question:

How can I continue to exist in a low vibe reality, protecting myself… while planning and manifesting for a better and high vibe reality… one where I let down by defenses?

Because in a high-vibe, positive and prosperous reality you will have switched your defenses off, because you won’t need them…

But in the current reality, with the horrible job and nasty boss, the defenses need to be switched on, and personal and energy boundaries need to be up and working.

So the two realities… inner and outerpresent and future… require a different level of armoring.

But what your Unconscious Mind notices… even when the man is doing his daily affirmations…

You do know that while you are doing your daily affirmations… you have your inner defenses switched on… which is sending out totally mixed and contradictory signals… right? And while that happens, I don’t know who to believe… so I am going to stick to what I know… defending you from the low vibe reality which is really out there… we go there 5 days a week… rather then take the risk of replacing it with something better, but dropping our defenses to do so. That’s the safest option… until you give me a clearer message about what you want… and what to do about it… not going to drop our defenses.”

So the question here is very much… what is reality… and which one should take precedence?

The internal or the external? The now or the future?

For the man in our example…

If he goes with the internal reality, then to successfully manifest his better future he will need to lower his defenses… because they’re not needed in that reality… but doing so, in his current present, could leave him undefended and unprepared… and there are parts of his Brain which could / would overrule any attempt to do so… because their primary design is to protect him at all costs… regardless of what might be lost in the process… protect him from his horrible present.

When our Brain goes into Fight, Flight, and Freeze Mode… then it switches off what it considers to be non-essential systems… such as reproduction and higher thinking… and focuses totally on the present moment, and any body system which helps it to survive.

I believe a similar thing happens on the energy level… which really is a problem… because many turn to affirmations and the Law of Attraction when they are desperate… in dire straights… and trying to pull themselves out of a big, black hole…

Which is actually when the Brain tends to switch on Fight, Flight, and Freeze… which are designed to focus on the present moment… not manifesting for the future.

In fact, many of the higher brain functions, which are used by future thinking, are either switched off, or dialed down, in such circumstances.

Yep… Catch-22.

But then how do you manifest something better… because, for our example man, it looks like the chips are stacked against him?

As they are against so many people trapped in similar situations.

Our Fight-Flight-Freeze Brain… which has evolved over a millennia, designed to keep us safe and alive… is at total odds with our Higher Brain and Imagination… and our desire to create a future which is better.

Fortunately… there is a workaround.

A mental loophole… which we can take advantage of.

Remember earlier, we also mentioned time as being another dimension of reality.

In our Brains, time… and space… is a lot more flexible then you might think.

Well… fortunately… it’s the flexibility of time, as it exists in the Human Brain, which comes to our rescue at times like this.

Being able to step in and out of situations… within our imagination… while also being able to step in and out of time.

It’s really a matter of clarity and discernment… and setting things up in the correct order.

So what I suggest to someone in such a circumstance?

Well, first piece of advice… unlock the door when you enterlock the door again when you leave.

So you’re saying to your Unconscious Mind… when in old job, yep, personal boundaries are set to maximum… but in our new and better future, lower them, because not needed…

Yes, when I am in bed, doing my affirmations, I can relax, and be open… but when I reach work, protect me.

And the 360 Degree Relaxation Audio Essence can help with this… helping to switch off the Fight, Flight & Freeze mechanism… when it is appropriate to do so.


The fact is that, in your imagination, you can have multiple present momentsmultiple nows… and your Unconscious Mind doesn’t have a problem with this… as long as you are clear about what you are doing and intending.

So with our example… we have two situations:

  • A: The horrible job present… which we still need to protect ourselves from
  • B: The exciting and fulfilling future… which we would like to be our present… isn’t yet… but we’re pretending that it is…

And we need to find a way to successfully juggle… and incorporate… both… while also finding a way to move from A to B.

Bit like having our temporal cake and while also eating it… in the past, present and future.

Well… the first thing… you cannot ignore A… so a good thing would be to try and focus some of that manifestation muscle / magic on changing it… improving it… for your better… even if in relatively small ways.

Especially if that new manifestation for A involved you learning and growing… finding a way to prosper and expand, even in difficult circumstances…

As a wise Tibetan Lama once said, even in the most difficult of circumstances there is a little shard of light… and our task is to find it… and gently hold it in our hands. breath upon it… so that it can expand. Love the beauty you can find… and not the pain or the ugliness.

Which means changing the gestalt… because often when we want to escape something, we are 100% locked into the ugliness and the pain… its our whole motivation to get away… and that still may be the wisest thing to do… in the medium to long-term… although may not be practical in the short-term… so you got to plan for it.

But the other wise thing this Lama said…. Never try to love the ugliness, hoping that it will change for the better… it won’t… only focus your love on the beauty, on any positivity you can find.

So if your boss is a bully… never love or accept that. That’s part of his ugliness.

But if he coaches underprivileged kids in his spare time… OK, that’s a part of him you can appreciate.

As long as you don’t get the two confused.

Never try to love someone’s ugly or negative behavior hoping that it will change… it won’t… and they will just take all your loving energy, without so much as a thank you.

People can contain both ugliness and beauty… and so we need to be aware of that… and so be careful about what you choose to engage with… because ultimately, that feeds into your own positive and negative sides.

And, to be honest, it’s really all about you. Because if you can find things in your situation to love or appreciate… that makes you feel better… that’s what is important. So its really about you in the end. Find things… or ways of looking at things… which make you feel better and lightens your day… even if it is only a series of small victories.

OK, we have to be realistic here… and there may not be anything much you can do about changing the horrible boss… because they have free-will… and not all horrible bosses just want to be loved deep down… some of them are horrible just because they can… some really are small-minded, mean and nasty… have to be realistic… not everyone wants to play nice.

And so sometimes your life-lesson really is about protecting yourself… and having firm personal and energy boundaries.

But you have to remember to switch them on when needed… and switch them off when no longer required (i.e. when you get home… back to a safe place, where you can relax… safe and sound).

However, as Victor Frankl always said… You always have total control over your consciousness…and how you choose to respond to any given situation… and you can therefore control / choose where and what you focus on.

At the moment, our example man is clock-watching… but what if… he also ran a daily affirmation which stated that:

I enjoy my work… I always have interesting things to do… and the time just flies by.”

If that were to manifest… that would improve his day 100%, don’t you think?

And even with a Bad Boss, his Unconscious Mind will probably find ways to bring light and positive enjoyment into the role.

Thing is… if we are actively working with A… trying to improve it… even if only in smalls ways… then you are striving to learn your life lessons (which is often what bad situations are about)… but you are no longer just trying to escape from it… and when you can do that… the whole attitude of the Universe can change… to you and your life-direction.

Been there… seen it happen… once… twice… and right now, again… thrice.

But if you dodge a life-lesson… truth is… you will only meet it further on down the line… your Soul and Universe will make sure of that.

No skipping lessons on the Earth school.

Big truth now… you can engage positively with an uncomfortable situation while also taking steps to grow beyond it (i.e. escape)… I have done that twice in my life… so I know it is possible… hard sometimes, but possible.

And I am currently working on the third… but looking good so far.

Now… to end… some visualization and some NLP magic.

Imagine a path which stretches out in front of you…

This is your timeline… from your present moment out into your future…

Next, imagine two rooms… each with a door… both rooms in front of you… next to each other… both representing two different present moments

Remember, I said your Unconscious Mind doesn’t have a problem with doing this… having two different present moments.

If we use the example of our man… one room represents his horrible job… and when he enters this room he can do his visualizations to make it better… improve things… remembering to close and lock the door when he leaves…

And the other room represents the better life he wants to create for himself…

So he can go into each room… do the specific affirmations and visualizations…

And his Unconscious Mind understands exactly what he is doing… because he has set up the intention of what each room represents…

Next… the NLP magic…

When he has come out of each room… he stands back…

The room which represents his current reality, which he wants to de-energize, he imagines it getting smaller, and the color is draining out of it… it’s all fading to grey…

While the room / future reality he does want to energize, he imagines it getting larger, brighter, more colorful and vivid…

Which is the NLP way of energizing one, while de-energizing the other…

OK… it may sound like a bit of mental juggling… but it is the best way I have found to square this particular circle… to literally survive the old while also focusing on manifesting a new and better future.

To literally surf between different realities… between present moments and better futures.

(c) Brian Parsons, April 2018.

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